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JensenPark

3. Danger Dogz
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    11
  • Country

    Canada

Everything posted by JensenPark

  1. If only my wife was like you. Can hear, but cannot respond. When you say your ISP server was hacked - does that mean your main provider was knocked down? Hope your 'puter or tower set up was not affected.
  2. If you liked the Hollywood version better than the original - you're not gay - just dumb.
  3. OK boys, how is your gaydar meter working ?...... GENTLEMEN, IT'S TIME FOR YOUR ANNUAL "AM I GAY?" SELF-EXAMINATION 1. If you are over thirty and you have a washboard stomach, you are gay. It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet. 2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat is like a dog, but gay - it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog .... "Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here, Killer!" Now think about how you call a cat... "Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay. 3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on bar-b-que ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, crawfish guts, pickled pigs feet, or tits. Anything else and you are in training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a fag. 4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his bathroom; he defecates and urinates where he pleases. 5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like a high hard one in the poop chute. Coffee is to be strong, black, and full aroma. A straight man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim" and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had Nutra-Sweet in your mouth, you've had a man there, too. 6. If you know more than six names of colors or four different types of dessert, you might as well be handing out free passes to your ass. A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Major leagues, NFL, NHL, college ball,PGA and NASCAR. If you can pick out chartreuse or you know what a "fressier" is you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious. 7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, Forget it, you're dying to tune a meat whistle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-ass driver or to cut the punk off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a hamburger, hold his beer, or play with his honey in the passenger seat. 8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films, mon-frere, vous le Gay, oui? The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC spontaneous homosexual combustion), which is what happens to fags when they flame out too. 9. If you belong to a squadron called "The Fist of the Fleet" you are just dying to be fisted no doubt.
  4. I find it hard to hold on to my x45 with all the hair on my palms...
  5. well, if your shooting is anything like the others who where the red lion, then we are all pretty safe...
  6. p40 field mod available with rockets?
  7. man those are great shots...where'd you find them? Can't wait to lawndart while trying to strafe them.
  8. Nah, actually the only time these clowns attack you is when you are about to reach for the last bottle of beer in the case, or drain the last ounce of scotch. Then things get truly ugly.
  9. I think the La's could always do that...lol
  10. take a look at the main forum... someone has found a way to crack the il2 coding and change the dm, etc on planes. bastards.
  11. JensenPark

    enlisted

    I am sure some of us would like new members...preferably without the lesions and scabbing.
  12. HEY! I am pa rt Portugese! GO PORTUGAL!! Broo-ha-HA! Hey DT: drinking a quart of Port a day does not qualify you as Portugese...
  13. GO ENGLAND ON SATURDAY!! Wishing you mates well.
  14. JensenPark

    enlisted

    Welcome Flash. New guy buys the beer. We'll be over to Sweden shortly. Please stock the fridge.
  15. Wish I could charge that much... Biz is a bit tight these day...might actually have to work a bit.
  16. Not a landing craft. It's a Canadian aircraft carrier. Budget cuts and all, you see...
  17. Probably because you, like most of us here, are wondering if you are in fact, still a man.............. And because that's probably where that stench is coming from............ (you really need to get that looked at) :wink: Ok, getting too gross now. I will save my retort till next we meet - and then run like hell as you will probably want to punch me.
  18. Hey, you're not our leader because of your looks! :wink:
  19. Ahh, but you forget our secret weapon... BG! Yes, my little Island friend...tremble before the drinking might that is BlairGowrie!!!!!!
  20. great little article. I knew he served - but thought it was in the Pacific on Iwo Jima... thanks for posting.
  21. we're not coming over for Duxford...we're coming to drink your booze and take your women!
  22. Why am I looking down at my crotch?
  23. Check with Arsenal on this...I think it's happened to him a few times.
  24. Me, BG and a bunch others are coming over in 2007 I think. Can you just wait for us there?
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